Every item on The List may never be crossed out. There may never be the flowers, walk and song nor the giant wheel and popcorn. Or the silent moments where only the company matters. There might not even be a letter, a peck or an engaging conversation. And the compliments, smart ass comments, dinky smiles and mischief. But quite honestly, I don't care anymore.

Every experience, every bond I forge, all my fears are reaffirmed. Now, it only seems like familiar territory. Almost like I can predict things.

Does it have something to do with me? For Sure!! "Yay" if things happen, "Tsk, Tsk" if they don't and move along. I dunno how many times I've wished that some things had just never happened! Maybe I'm being selfish, but it would have saved ME a lot of trouble and drama. I'm done with pinning my hopes on anything.

After all, a cynic is a passionate person who doesn't want to be disappointed again.