Bells Will Ring

Somebody very important to me is getting married. She and I are thrilled to bits with all the festivities and grand plans that a wedding brings along with it. Choosing the right dress, the decorations, making the guest list, picking the right food and wine, finalizing the venue... There is so much excitement in the air. I went ring shopping with the boy last year and they make the sweetest couple ever.

Yesterday she sent me a short email with a little secret and lots of sentiments. It is undoubtedly the loveliest thing that has come my way in years.

This November I'm going to see the world's most beautiful bride walk down the aisle to marry her perfect man.

Candy Floss, you truly deserve all the happiness the universe has to offer. 

*Happy Sigh*

In a few weeks I am going to be unemployed. While most people are giving me free advice and wondering why I'm not actively searching for anything new, I can't help but not think about how my career graph is going to end up.

I'm excited. There's a wedding in the family. After ages we're all going to be together again. My artsy-craftsy moods visit me regularly and I like how they work their magic on me. I'm making good use of a thoughtful gift and visit the neighbourhood library frequently. When my "final settlement" cheque comes I'm going to be rich (okay temporarily but rich is rich!) and I'm thinking of a short but well deserved holiday.

The job, the steady income... it will all come. As of now, I'm going to LIVE IT UP! Life's looking great :)

Before taking any decision I ask myself one question: Will this make you happy?

Somehow putting things under the Yes/No light helps to lead an uncomplicated life.

Yes, shifting and starting afresh in a new city, meeting and working with new people, indulging in some soul searching... all of it is going to make me happy. Very happy.

Some days...

...just go by. The same mundane routine, the same road you walk on, the same pair of jeans... And on such a day when you least expect it, you get smashed by an A-ha moment. Right there... hitting your head, heart and soul. You rise from the dead. And you begin to feel.

This is significant because it makes me feel content. Let go off the bumpy past. Let the future be. Just that one moment was the closest to your idea of perfection. And now you roll in it, look at it from every angle, play with it and then allow it to calm you down. Its beauty lies in its unpredictable nature. And how it makes you believe once again.

Gonna enjoy this for all that it is worth. Every bit of it.... While this plays in the background.

Some days must be lived all over again :)

Of Conversations

My students go for drama class every Monday and Wednesday. The drama teachers are currently working on strengthening their (the kids') lungs. Today there was a flurry of excitement because they all got brightly coloured balloons to blow. Some of them were able to huff and puff and pump a lot of air in while the others tried relentlessly. One little boy after trying for a few minutes was on the brink of tears because his balloon just wouldn't swell up.

Me: Sweetheart, just try a little harder. I'm sure you'll be able to do it.

Little Boy: It's not happening! I'm going to take it home and try.

Me: That's probably a good idea. You must be tired right now.

Little Boy: No, Teacher. I have a vacuum cleaner at home. It will fill the balloon up!

Ah! The joy in working with kids! :)

:)

Thanks to a very cool person I know, I now own every Simon and Garfunkel song ever recorded.

"Hey, I've got nothing to do today but smile."

I like that blog I follow. It brightens up my mood no matter what. It makes me realize that there are things that I take for granted and yet it makes me smile because I know what the writer is talking about. Almost like a whack on the side of the head. A nice kind of a whack. Most importantly, I feel something stir inside for a brief moment everyday and if you were me you would understand why that takes centre stage in my life as of now. I hold onto that moment. I need it for my well being. Today's post talks about "Saying Thanks". Gratitude. The most beautiful thing about being thankful is that everyone is in a win-win situation... and the world just feels that much happier. And for all you cynics and pessimists out there, *tthhbbp*. I teach 4 year olds for a living. The first lesson we learn is to be happy within. It is only then that you can create without.

Starting here, I'm going to spread some cheer, love and thankfulness every single day. The mind is already buzzing with ideas.

Right now, a big shout out to two people who have become an indispensable part of my inner circle. First, my very understanding, smart, fun, mommy-like, unbelievably efficient mentor. You inspire me to reach out for the stars and make sure that I have a fab time while doing so. Thank you for the love, support, patience and pieces of banana pound cake :)

And Ms. DTQ, you're undoubtedly the most "sorted out" 21 year old I know. We both know that this relationship goes beyond the four walls of school. Be it our times at Peco's, our common love for music and art, post beer adventures or just the conversations on life and other things... I am grateful that you landed up one fine August morning.

Even gooey chocolate cake wouldn't make me feel this good inside :)

It is meaningful because...

...it drives my bad mood away. Huffin' and puffin' up the slope only leads to an exhilarating ride down and nothing, I repeat, NOTHING can beat that feeling. It makes the alcoholic high seem blah and Runner's high takes a backseat. The beauty lies in the fact that you just have to keep going. It may almost kill you, make your legs numb and walk all wobbly but there's an unparalleled sense of achievement when you go that extra kilometer.

It...undoubtedly..is all about the bike!

I don't know if it is just me or there actually is too much love in the air for anyone to handle. Every where I turn, I only see pink hearts and mush. People are getting married, celebrating anniversaries, putting up photographs with their better halves yada yada.... Gets the machinery going in my head.

Single and unavailable. That's how I described myself for the last I-don't-know-how-many years. There was just something so powerful about the phrase. It felt good to just not belong to anyone. Yes, there were periods of drama but my indifference finally won (phew!) and life went on. Till I figured something wasn't okay.

Emotionally Dead. I couldn't get myself to care about another person. That is to say that I would be nice, courteous, helpful but that was it. I didn't treasure any memories or emotions when my day ended. Any signs of a guy acting strange or obsessive would set off the alarms and all I could tell myself is: Put your sneakers on and runnnn!. So much so, I held on firmly to my belief that people are annoying and the lesser I have to do with them, the better it was for me. And with that, I murdered my social life. But now the times they are a-changin'

I'm learning to be more open to new people. No, I'm not a snob. Just that I'm always at one end of the spectrum. I can't ever find a balance but hey, I'm trying! and the truth is..... it feels good. They say that this is the age that women sub-consciously start pairing themselves with men... something like picking the best of the lot. Maybe it's true, I don't know but at least I'm sure that I am finally going with the flow and making a sincere attempt to stop being judgmental. Some things stay... Some I can compromise on...

A song that I heard this evening put me in a really good mood. It's gonna be a fun year. I can feel it in my fingers, toes, bones, in the air

Maybe the "un" bit from my tag is finally falling off :)

There's Something So:

Comforting about Simon and Garfunkel's music

Adorable about Muddy paw prints everywhere

Charming about well dressed men

Gorgeous about Audrey Hepburn

Calming about the moon

Soulful about Jason Mraz's voice

Irritating about horns and crackers

Sinful about Mississippi mud pies

Warm about my blanket

Happy about yellow, pumpkins, popcorn and bubble wrap

Cool about a very high best friend

Funky about a store in the city

Fun about the mater

Right about just plain platonic relationships

Exciting about stationery

Cute about dimples

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost

I was always told that I had my fingers in too many pies. Logically, it should have worked for me because I had a plethora of options to choose from. All I knew was that whatever I did with my life, it had to involve people, lots of colour, madness and creativity.

This is the MBA generation. In most cases, money talks while satisfaction takes a back seat. So isn't that supposed to be the path I take?

I work the other way round. A fat salary at the end of every month didn't stop me from chucking everything to the side and chasing my dream. No matter how much it paid me, the levels of happiness would be unparalleled. At least I was sure of that. And I wasn't wrong.

After 2 years, I know that no high flying corporate career will ever be able to match up to the joy of teaching, giving, learning and loving. My first day at work and I know I can do this for the rest of my life. This is where I belong. This is passion!

The last time I gave my heart away like this was 7 years ago when I picked up a book that had "ECONOMICS for Class XII" written on the cover.

This time it's to a wonderful little place called Neev.

Somewhere in my head I always thought that the final showdown would break me into pieces or make me contemptuous. Strangely, what I feel inside is a strong sense of security; like bliss has arrived in that sparkling silver foil... the one they use to wrap Hershey's kisses.

My vicious cycle has ended. I feel it my fingers. I feel it in my toes. I definitely feel it everywhere I go.

W-o-n-d-e-r-f-u-l!

*big toothy smile*

P.S. Forgiving yourself is not something that's meant to be delayed

P.P.S. *Bigger toothier smile*

Come Away With Me

Come away with me in the night
Come away with me
And I will write you a song

Come away with me on a bus
Come away where they can't tempt us
With their lies

And I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won't you try to come?

Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you

And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me

Play this like a movie.

"So you're from Bangalore, eh? I'm from Kolkatta." Next thing I knew, she had made me shift all my luggage to her room and we were walking towards the dining hall. After a quick meal, we got back to the room and started arranging our stuff. I noticed that she had two packets of Pure Magic (Chocolate) biscuits and I decided that I liked her already. Slowly revealing that she was a fan of The Beatles, Dylan and that she played the piano only helped swing the case in her favour. This was going to be a very enjoyable stay.

The next day was packed with lectures, presentations and lots of learning. I was dealing with certain concepts for the first time. They were complex albeit interesting. They pushed me to think. Sitting in a class filled with people who owned multiple degrees and several years of experience left me a little lost but I knew I'd last. The first set of classes whizzed past and before I realised it, it was time to go home and gear myself up for the work that followed.

Meeting deadlines. Studying. Studying some more. Writing. Receiving feedback. Dunno when the first semester ended and it was time to go back. By then I had new things to distract me. The next few months didn't turn out the way I would've liked them to but I survived.

Third Semester - A mind blowing class on language, an extension of Child Psychology and finally Sociology became like-able. Apart from that, there were trips to Town, movies, conversations over meals, loads of music and everyday I discovered something new. Ah, and thank heavens for the friendships that got redefined.

Back home and it felt like I was on a high... perpetually. The field work just increased the levels. I was blown! I knew that work would never be mundane and mechanical. There was so much to think, do, create and pass on... and having Padmini as a mentor was the biggest blessing.

The last trip. Every class was a fulfilling experience. Juggling language, history, civics, geography and policies was one helluva task. Then came the "scary" presentation and 10000 word report. Well, I got to see the days beyond them. The last semester bound everything for me - Learning, relationships, passion, and of course, my To Do lists.

Monday night, our results were declared. When I look back now, amidst all the whining, cribbing and moments of zero motivation, there were times where I've felt thankful for all that I have. The expansive pool of knowledge we were introduced to, the lighter side of the serious academicians we were exposed to, the late night confessions and admissions in the four walls of the hostel room, tying everyone with the thread of music, getting Jenny to not think of certain things, embarrassing ourselves in the dining hall, fun in Ambrosia with chocolate cake being massacred, "Rani bar", exploring the city by the sea, realising how little we actually know and how eager we are to learn, graduating from one of the finest institutions in the country, feeling powerful and alive..... It was so worth it!

The journey always is the destination.

Let's give it up for the MAEE batch of 2008-2010. Big hug to all of you!

Some Kind of Wonderful...

Blank sheets. Striped Post-its. Kolhapuri chappals. Carnations. Black and White photographs. In sepia too. Orange ice candy. Little lab pups. Silver jewellery. Second hand books. Dream catchers. Mommy's dal chawal and aloo methi subzi. Music and lyrics. Horlicks. Jholas. Bangles. Chocolate cake. Long walks. Handmade paper. Note on the piano. Guitar strings. Hugs. Children going to school early morning. Pottery. Pretty hands, pretty feet. Dimples. Sunshine. The moon. Cherry blossom pink. Blankets. Fruits. Snail mail. Parcels with ribbons. Purple Sweaters. "Shine boards". Maps. Paint. Ferris wheels. Fabric. People. Bus rides. Art villages. Scooters: in yellow. Ah-a moments. Button noses. Street food. Tic-toc-s. Jogs. Being free spirited.

You mope, you sigh, you whine, you cry

Crib, snarl, smirk, stick your tongue out

You scream and yell, push and squeal

And then...

You smile like a moron :)

For 2010

A li'l less confusion, a li'l more clarity, less selfishness, more selflessness, less laziness, more discipline, less you and me, more we, less childishness, more child likeness, less silence, more music, less of the indoors, more of the outdoors, a li'l less conversation, a li'l more action.