Unforgettable, thats what you are
Unforgettable though near or far...


You're gonna live forever... in memories, in our hearts.

One of those things...

Life. What is it really about? Debates and arguments throw various opinions out in the open. Books and poetry offer several interpretations. "Great" minds and laymen have their own definitions. Is it about dreams? Goals? Aspirations? Money? Wealth? Love? Hope? Nothing at all? I don't know. I'm just a 21 year old trying to figure out stuff for myself, moving in and out of confusion and fears hoping that I don't mess up this one chance that I have. Yeah, I have dreams.. real big ones! At one point of time, I would have readily given up everything to reach for the stars. But today, where I stand, I know how different my thoughts are! I think I've found what I was looking for.

Life... lies in those spontaneous moments when you don't do anything spectular but just know that you are gonna remember every detail forever. It's about singing loudly in autos with your favourite people even if it means getting thrown out; dancing on the roads, restaurants, buses without giving a damn about what others think of you; about laughing your head off over the silliest things and getting others to join you. It's about eating ice cream when every inch of you is frozen and having a hot water bath on a sunny day, skipping an exam to watch a movie, eating rum tarts even when your stomach's gonna burst, grabbing a cup of coffee and a light hearted conversation in corridors, fooling around with paint and believing that you just created a masterpiece and gazing at clouds and stars. Life's joys lie in long drives with your favourite song playing, watching the rain and spending time by yourself. It also lies in coming home to a tray of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, warm hugs, bonding with your family, black and white photographs and old books that have dog ears and yellow pages that still smell of dust. Life can be captured in a glass of hot milk and a cozy blanket as well as in an evening spent with friends. It finds its way into moments when you climb water tanks in a drunken state, make a mess while eating melted chocolate, explore a new city or just get completely lost in the one you live in, whistle in a theatre, watch your favourite artist "live in concert", find a pair of jeans that finally fit, feed a hungry puppy, get muddy paw prints on your white T Shirt for free or have a pillow fight with your sibling and then go back and apologise. A flip-floppy stomach, weak knees, compliments, Cupid's arrow, tears, heartbreaks? Yes, life has space for all of that too. It's about midnight conversations, parties, disclosing secrets, having someone comfort you when you are low, long chats in playgrounds, on benches, on stairs; gossiping in hostel rooms, whining and strumming your guitar even after your fingers have turned numb. It lies in receiving a letter, giving somebody a hand made gift, opening a present, buying balloons for the little kids who run around on the streets, saying hello to a total stranger and being a part of someone else's sorrows and joys.It features in fights, failure, empty promises, shattered dreams, screwed up friendships and experiences that build character. And It's about learning to love, let go and forgive a little every single day.

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans"
- John Lennon

Tired of ISD!

The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.

- Erma Bombeck

One of my favourite authors said it all. Mom, Dad, the Big Brother: Come back people! The brats and I are missing you like crazy! We need some TLC :(

"If your dog is fat, it means you aren't getting enough exercise"

-Unknown

How true. *Sigh*

The brats and I are getting back into shape starting tomorrow...

Fancy!

Last evening this young bloke told me that my English is very "Britishy". I'm still trying to figure out how and why:)

Dedication Time!

This one's for two people I'm very fond of. One I've known for close to a decade now and the other (though it's been about a year), I feel like I've known her for ages. Both of them, to put it simply, get me! No amount of madness would ever flummox them.

My partner in crime & my radio partner, here's what I would like to say :)

Familiarity breeds contempt

For sure!!!!

Hee Haw!!

One second.




* WHINE *




Ha! That felt good!!! Okay, now we go back to being happy, fun loving, positive people who have what it takes to be 1 of 25 who were chosen to study at one of the finest institutions in the country. We are not afraid of term papers and are going to submit them before the deadline. We have dreams and the courage to follow our hearts. We're full of beans. Silly things are not going to spoil the mood and we shall pamper ourselves at the end of this part of the magnificent journey! yeah, Bring it on!!!

Boca Grande

Heh.. If you are Bong, you're bound to laugh your head off at the name of this joint. That's what happened to Tuts when I told him we could grab a bite there. He seemed keen to try it out so we went ahead and experimented. I won't say we were disappointed but the food's nothing great. But we still ended up sitting there way past his lunch break. We last met on his birthday. Needless to say, we had a LOT of catching up to do. Now one thing I love Tuts for is his ability to chatter away... and lend a patient ear when I need to talk. So we chatted, laughed, laid bets on Socrates and Leo, exchanged stories and whined about the alien, purple salad. We stuffed ourselves and walked up the road for ice cream and continued blabbering. Finally, we said our goodbyes (he might as well have applied for half a day's leave) and went in opposite directions.

Today will go down as one of my most memorable days. There is tremendous joy in meeting old friends. My head was rather clouded last night and I don't know what opened up in the conversation I had with Tuts but I left feeling a lot lighter. He made everything seem very simple. Tuts, I'm glad we went on that crazy trip together. The dancing, the dumb charades session, the singing, the comments... all of it was worth it. Like I said, I am amazed at how we can pick it up from right where we left it. Muah!

P.S. Though I didn't really need it after such a fabulous time, I indulged in some retail therapy. Ah! :)

Both Sides Now

Bows and flows of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
I've looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
I've looked at clouds from both sides now

From up and down, and still somehow
It's cloud illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at all

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I've looked at love that way

But now it's just another show
You leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away

I've looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It's love's illusions I recall
I really don't know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say "I love you" right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way

But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I've changed
Well something's lost, but something's gained
In living every day

I've looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all

I've looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all

This song captures exactly what I feel right now. Confusion prevails....

6 Kgs and 2 inches less

Let me share my moment of joy!! All the cycling, walking around and running away from junk food has helped. People, I have officially lost all the Hyd weight! It feels good that I now fit into my favourite pair of jeans! I'd like to thank Mommy for all that ghar ka khana and whacking me everytime I reached out for chips and cookies and Leo for being awesome company during my walks and cycling rounds. Woo hoo!!! :)

Is it good to be expressive? Even if it means going overboard with the way you feel? There are some people who find it silly to hide emotions. I'm one of those weirdo-es. No matter how I feel, I make it known to everyone around me. No, not because I want the attention and want to be mollycoddled. But I find it impossible to suppress my sentiments. The few times that I've tried for various reasons, I've ended up feeling MISERABLE! But what happens in the case of unequal love? Is it good or bad to tell them what they mean or don't mean to you? Is it right or wrong to be expressive and open about everything? Is it fair to expect anything in return?

Expectation. There are days when I wish I could learn to live without it. But I know I can't. And for me, that is what being human is all about.

Madness!

It thrills me to no end that she's just a 10 p SMS, a local call, a bus ride away. Mum can now have shopping free days. Chubby, I promise I'll fulfill the condition to put my wallet in your bag. And though you've refused to come with me when I go to get my tattoo (which will happen I don't know when), You're the best!! :)

If wishes were horses...

My funny valentine
Sweet comic valentine
You make me smile with my heart
Your looks are laughable
Unphotographable
Yet you're my favourite work of art

Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak
Are you smart?

But don't change a hair for me
Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine stay
Each day is Valentines' day

Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak
Are you smart?

But don't you change one hair for me
Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine stay
Each day is Valentines' day

*Mmmm*

Yes DB, someday there will be people who will sing the entire list to us. Till then you and I will laugh about every "tragedy" that takes place in our lives.

748 Lines

A bright yellow envelope that stares at me when I look at my phone. A red blob that suddenly vanishes but the conversation goes on. A secret that doesn't seem obscure anymore. A smile that freezes. A song that finds its way to the soul. A poem that stays unwritten because the feeling is indescribable. A city that seems far away. A friendship that is untouched by impurity. A connection that gladdens the heart.

:(

Term paper fever is the worst thing to hit me this month. I'm very jittery about writing anything at all. No longer can I console myself by saying -It's your first time. Don't be hard on yourself. But I know I work well under pressure. I only wish I could master the art of time management. Don't we all? Feeling blue. *Sigh*

Dropping a line for my coach. Like instant coffee, you're an instant cheer upper! :)

Closure

May the ribbons fray, may all the paper burn and may the glue dry up. May photographs be shredded, may memories be wiped away. May heartbreaks, lost friends and broken promises stay where they belong - in the past. May I never feel the need to "understand" from this moment on. May it be as easy to say goodbye as it is to say hello. May I never have to say hello again. May I find a solution to my ennui without looking for it. May I stop thinking with my heart and start thinking with my head. Let technology crumble and may I never have to communicate again. Let me discover love but it may it be only for my dreams. May all those conversations remain unfinished. May I find peace in detachment. May I forget what emotions are all about. May there be no more tears and fears. May the clouds take me along with them. May life always maintain its fine balance.

Today's lunch turned out to be quite strange. I had some work to attend to and was meeting Rith to catch up on all the news over a meal. I took a table and was just settling down when the waiter (whom we shall call "H") came with the menu card. I told him that I was waiting for someone to join me and we would place our order soon. He smiled and said "Okay, Ma'am. Once your friend comes, please call out my name and I'll come and take your order." I agreed and followed the instructions once Rith came. We stuck to our favourites and H seemed unusually happy to serve us. Mid-way through the meal he came and asked us if we were enjoying ourselves and ten minutes later, he brought us fresh water and extra napkins (and went overboard with his smiles). Rith and I thought it was really odd because all the times that we've eaten in that restaurant (and its other branches), no one's tried so hard to impress us. More importantly, we didn't know why! Anyway, we finished our meal, continued chatting and finally when the bill came, Rith and I lost it. We couldn't stop giggling. Not shy, girlie giggles but more like WTF-is-wrong-with-him giggles. We paid the bill and walked out. Rith, your charm continues to work like magic and may it always be so :)



As for H, we weren't very generous with our tip.

At another branch, the waiter wanted to know if I was Assamese because he was from Assam and my name apparently sounds very Assamese. I wasn't charged for his lopsided smile. Wotevah!

Passionate Yellow Earring

Sometimes the most spur-of-the-moment things live on forever. I don't think I'll ever turn into someone who doesn't fit the title. I hope not :)

Namma Bengaluru

I flicked the idea from here but of course it's all about my city.

- Cubbon Park, Cubbon Park, Cubbon Park. Thank god for the People's movement that happened in the 80's that stopped further construction within the park premises. Apart from the lush green trees, the park has some beautiful buildings including the Sheshadri Memorial Library, The high court and the Vidhan Soudha. When you visit my city, take a drive through Cubbon Park. Hopefully, you'll understand why it tops my list.

- MG Road. I hate the fact that the road no longer has a boulevard on one side but nonetheless it's still my favourite place to walk. Or just sit at a coffee shop by myself and watch the world go by.Parallel to MG Road is Church Street and that is one place that will never cease to amuse me. There are a few pubs and countless eating joints. Food lovers can pick from Chinese, Japanese, Indian, Continental, roadside thellawallahs.... And for the book lovers, Blossoms is the place to go. I'm not exaggerating when I say that the bookstore is stacked with books from floor to ceiling. There's also an interesting magazine store. For me, MG Road and Church Street bring back old world charm.

- The weather. Although it's extremely unhealthy for some people, Bangalore's weather is wonderful. It's always just right and definitely helps me get by bad days. Quite aptly called Pensioner's Paradise.

- The Breakfast and Dessert places. Yes, I meet people for breakfast because there are places that serve a delightful meal at 7 in the morning. Some even have breakfast buffets. Throw in a light conversation and great company and my day's made. oh and at Koshy's, the menu card still mentions Goldspot. How about that? Coming to the dessert bit, I don't mind the extra kilos I put on after indulging in those mouth watering cakes and bakes served at Fresco's and Painted Platter. Sinful!

- School. How can this not make it to the list? I believe that school was like a second home to me. In fact I would've loved to do 13th, 14th and 15th standard instead of college. What amuses me is that right in between two of the city's busiest roads, you'll find a green campus with old British barracks that have seen batches after batches pass out. Well, the batch of 2003-2004 can never get enough of school.

- Commercial Street. Paradise for the avid shopper! The road and its gullies offer enough and more for retail therapy. Right from the big brands to the roadside maal, shoes, bags, belts, dress material, stationery, decorations, food, jewellery, sports equipment.. you name it and it's available. It's the best venue for a girl's day out :)

- William Penn & Itsy Bitsy. The mad child loves stationery. Period.

- National Games Village. Ha! Founding the Loafers club, Aunty's shop, the bakery, the park, the benches, forging friendships, Hindi movie drama, bus rides, the rooftop, summer parties, tears, fears, heartbreaks... Those buildings have seen the good, the bad and the ugly. It was the perfect place to spend my wonder years.

- 335 E. I love bus rides. And seeing that huge, red vehicle turning round the corner makes me very happy. I get to spend a lot of time by myself in the bus and I'm very thankful for it. Besides, it's the best way to avoid the traffic and all that honking. The government should introduce more Volvos on the routes.

- The concerts. Thanks to the crowd, Palace grounds has hosted Mark Knopfler, The Scorpions, Iron Maiden, Bryan Adams, Sting, Uriah Heep, Elton John, Roger Waters, Aerosmith, A R Rahman, Lucky Ali, KK etc. My city and I have something in common. We love music.

We, the people. Bangalore is a friendly city. The policemen are approachable and the people are helpful. The trick - Be polite and it'll get you anywhere you wish

Ten years ago, when we moved here, I HATED the place. It was a sleepy city where nobody seemed to want to make things happen. Compared to Delhi, this place was the pits. But it grew on me. Yeah, there is a lot of room for improvement. But even after having seen a lot of places within the country, I would like to settle down here. After all, there's no place like home!

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I wont disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armour,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

I mask my detachment with a veneer of indifference.

Birthday Time!

Oh and yesterday the li'l one finally turned 21! Isn't it strange that the youngest of us all is the most sensible, practical and balanced member of the Jinxed Club? But she scores a duck when it comes to common sense. I can almost hear her say "very funny". Chims, thank you for just being there for me through all those highs and lows. Love you to bits!

P.S. She's actually not jinxed. But she makes it a point to let us know when she wants to be :P

*Yawn*

There are so many thoughts on mind that I don't know where to begin. They range from happy, intellectual and funny to absurd, philosophical and sentimental. I have two term papers to submit by the end of this month and they seem like a mammoth task. It's not that I can't do it. I want them to be exceptionally good papers. A lot about it is to prove things to myself.. like the whole "manage house + life" phase. I want to feel like a responsible, YOUNG (21,22,23...57 years fall in the young category) adult. For starters, I've been driving a bit in the last couple of days and it's awesome! I've never thought of myself as a nervous wreck and I passed this test with flying colours. Trust me, driving near my place trains you to drive in any part of the world. Oh, and I applied for a job. Keeping my fingers crossed...(and hanging on to my horse shoe)

Coming to the funny bit, I seem to burst into incessant giggles anywhere I go. It happens so often that it's beginning to scare me. Like today while zooming through all the traffic, I suddenly thought of Prometo and the hostel incident and couldn't stop laughing. As it is I must have been quite a sight with my bright bike and silly looking helmet. Add my loud "Ha ha"s to that and I'm sure that I scared quite a few people away. Even right now I'm giggling about something that happened when I was 12. Old things still crack me up. The flip side? I'm getting way too emotional for my own good! Mindless, stupid movies with titles like Doodh ka karz and Sainik start the water works. I guess it's just my sub conscious way of balancing things out.

With regard to people, I feel like a hypocrite... and definitely a bigger one than the kind that exists in all of us. I'm trying hard to stay away from some people although we've shared some good times together. I don't have the patience to listen to their stories or the philosophy that they keep dishing out but don't feel like being downright frank about it. (Oooook... but atleast I'm trying to explore my diplomatic side.. that's if I have one.) Also, with a few shocking things doing the rounds, I'm beginning to wonder if some people are actually as nice as I make them out to be. These kind of thoughts are just reinstating the fundas I've followed to get by college... and of course, I passed on the knowledge. My girls are such rockstars!

I'll leave the happy thoughts for another day. I don't want them to disappear. I'd like to stay addicted. :)