Saturday, August 29, 2009

It isn't a void. Just a strange kind of emptiness. I need this out of my system.

I hate the flab. I wish I was skinny because it's a lot easier to put on weight than to lose it. And the nicknames just point to all the fat. Hate it.

Soooo.... it glows everywhere else except the most social part! Unfair.

I have a few months to go and then I don't know what. Clueless.

I care about almost everything including ex boyfriends and certain people. I wish I knew why.

I'm just too lazy to do anything with the talent. I should get a custom made L board.

Okra and milk are two things that I love. Turns out that I'm allergic to both. WTF?

I don't want to go through depression eating again.

I'm 22 and have nothing exciting happening. I want a little drama.

I want to spend my golden birthday by myself. By the sea.

Envision. Explode. Fade out.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I wish this would play on the radio every time I walked outside... And the weather needs to be *whee*

Warms the cockles of my heart.

Monday, August 24, 2009

*SOS*



Kaisa ajab yeh safar hai, socho to har ik hi bekhabar hai
Usko jaana kidhar hai, jo waqt aaye, jaane kya dikhaaye
Oh Oh Oh ...

Jagmagaate hain, jhilmilaate hain apne raastein
Yeh khushi rahe, roshni rahe apne waaste
Oh Oh Oh ...

Dil Chahta Hai ...


Ladies, that was undoubtedly the best night of my life!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Dear Box,

The call took me by surprise. You never call at that time of the day. While staring at my phone I told myself "Let's see what happens next." You gave me that laugh that I love. It was contagious. You asked why I sounded so happy on a Monday morning. I said I'm always happy. "Will you be this happy when you meet me tomorrow?" I said Yes. Something told me that even if the bus journey drained me of all my energy and work tired me out, I would still be chirpy when I met you. After all, I do pick my moods, don't I? We spoke. We were bubbling with stories, gave each other hints of what was happening and I quite like how you mentioned - You're the first person I called! It helped me keep that smile on.

I stayed away not because I was angry or upset. I just needed my time off to evaluate things. It worries you that I might turn aloof. How cute is that? Never for you... I really am just a phone call away. No matter how irritated or miffed I am with you, your secret weapon drives it all away. I hate that laugh!

Tuesday. How hard you tried to get me hooked on to that game. I promise you, Solitaire is the best that I can do. And trust me, I never ever feel like a guest at your place. In a lot of ways, it feels like my own house.

The breezy terrace was the perfect setting. We laughed, came up with theories - She's going to be really sophisticated and he's going to study the movement of white mice. Eh! How boring! Let's try this - Lots of dogs, a few kids and frequent visits. You bake me brownies and I'll churn out cookies. Oops! Time to go downstairs. Out comes the guitar... and amplifier... and processor... and then a voice that tries hard to sing a Beatles number. It slowly moves to a Hindi song. I step out for a minute and I'm welcomed with "I'm yours"... maybe because I once mentioned to you how crazy I am about that track. Of course, and how can we forget the ritual? I viewed my Youtube video for the day.

Love hits us in a lot of forms. Sometimes we make it out to be something that it definitely isn't and sometimes we ignore it. Today what I sensed was just plain love. It was platonic and pure, it was simple, it did not make us uncomfortable, it was complete. I didn't feel the need to justify or explain things to myself, it didn't trouble me that we still have very little in common and I definitely didn't feel like leaving. I know you didn't want me to. Maybe we finally moved away from the weirdness, insanity and frustration and allowed ourselves to connect with each other. Maybe we've just grown up. Like I told you, I'm glad we didn't give up on each other.

I know for a fact that you treasure this as much as I do.

Love,
Your little girl

Friday, August 14, 2009

62 and Going Strong...

It's not about being born into an army family, saying the pledge as a child or singing "patriotic" songs in school. It's more about a feeling that encapsulates love, respect and integrity. It about revisiting history and trying to capture the essence of the events, the emotions that they went through and connecting it with what we have. It's about wanting to make a difference to a place called home. And it's about feeling that way every single day.

No amount of space on the internet will do justice to what I'm going through right now. Goosebumpy is a start, I think.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Just this happy feeling inside. My godmother came home, I met someone who is keen on working in the line of education and asked if I could help out, I stuck to my diet, ran like crazy and finally sweated (I'm abnormal, I don't sweat so this is a very big deal for me), all my work is being submitted on time, I finally found the pink chappals I wanted, I'm learning something new everyday... all of it rolled into one makes me smile from ear to ear. *eeeeee*

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Woven!

Thank you, Ashwin for making my Friday evening delightful. Thank you for making me fall in love with the piano all over again. Julian Clef will be a star (if he isn't one already).

I will never grow tired of myself. My moods, my buzzing head, my cravings, my obsessions - will get bored of none. And that's a very comforting thought.

Being organised can be fun.

Tuts, you rule the list. Wine or whiskey, Shimoga or Bangalore, we Sagis know how to live the good life :)

Moon River stirs up in me feelings that may have been ignored. Only I know what that means.

I'm glad Ma sang Simon and Garfunkel to me when I was a kid. Actually, I am just glad she sang to me all the time.

Everyday I find myself saying this at least once : Dad and I are so alike!

It's a combination of Surf Excel and Dettol. What were we thinking then? Now it's clean :)

I got drunk. I sang to people. I sent happy messages. I spoke to Sid till my high wore off a little. I blamed it all on Rith. Some things never change.

Running's turning into an addiction. Thank you, Shreyas.

Knutz and I are partners in the weight loss programme.

I should've just gone to art school.

All you need is love.

V, stay safe in KL.

I'll grow up, may never feel the butterflies again and that's it. It scares me.

Someday, when I am awfully low and the world is cold, I will feel a glow just thinking of you...

The earth truly laughs in flowers.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Where did my weekend go?

Studying Psychology, cancelled lunch plans and finally being able to give a F*** about it, drinking coffee, Onion rings, Rith, Shreyas (Bless them!), less than 30 minutes on the bench, Bookworm, Rum tart, pierced ears, tiny bicycles, pretty pretty blouse from the sale, "Rum and Chocolate", "Breaking up is hard to do", Neil Sedaka, lovely drive back home, Tair-sadam (I'm a pseudo south Indian), staying up till 3 and going over the same stories again and again, "Happy Friendships Day" messages, dust cloth, cookies, DB's, reliving school days, just feeling free....

Some days things are just right!