Nothing's happened in the last couple of hours. I'm not PMSing. Nobody said or didn't say anything that pricked. Yet, I am in a state of sadness. Not frustrated, hurt, irritated, angry... Just sad.

Maybe it was the conversation with mom in the morning. Ma, although I would love to listen to you and do my bit to bond with the family, I'm sorry. I can't let go of what happened the last time I was there. Nobody needs to judge my abilities or make me feel like a numbskull. I am capable of managing myself rather well. And deep down, I know that you feel I'm completely justified in keeping my distance. If I do land up there, it would only be for you because you never ask me for anything.

Maybe it was a class that I don't really understand. Sometimes I feel my age is a disadvantage because my experiences of being a mad, weird, spaced out 21 year old with zero experience in the line enrich the class in absolutely no way. The material design classes are such a welcome change because we're expected to look beyond society, caste, gender blah blah.. Quite honestly, sometimes I feel people need to lighten up. Heck, except for a handful of people, I don't connect with anyone else. It bugs me. It really does. I've discovered how much I hate small talk. Breaking the ice is something else. Trying to behave like my best friend is a No-No.

Maybe it's because I'm craving for good food, muddy paw prints, a holiday and a burst of creativity.

Maybe I just need a hug to tell me that everything will be ok...