Thanks to a fest that's happening in school, I now have a 'sanitised' account on a popular social networking site. Making the most of my situation, I was browsing through a couple of profiles and ended up 'Tsk-Tsking' at the things children post.

Am I just growing older?

I just feel peacefully happy. It's the nice kind... As though it's covered with love and laughter :)

Not all choices that we make lead us to happiness. Sometimes we do things because they don't make us unhappy.

I can finally tell the difference. It struck me out of the blue yesterday. Wonder if it counts as an A-ha moment.

Bells Will Ring

Somebody very important to me is getting married. She and I are thrilled to bits with all the festivities and grand plans that a wedding brings along with it. Choosing the right dress, the decorations, making the guest list, picking the right food and wine, finalizing the venue... There is so much excitement in the air. I went ring shopping with the boy last year and they make the sweetest couple ever.

Yesterday she sent me a short email with a little secret and lots of sentiments. It is undoubtedly the loveliest thing that has come my way in years.

This November I'm going to see the world's most beautiful bride walk down the aisle to marry her perfect man.

Candy Floss, you truly deserve all the happiness the universe has to offer. 

Be yourself. It'll make the object of your affection fall madly in love with someone else. Be yourself. Every family gathering will have people singing praises of your sibling, cousin, dog, carpet while you're the perfect example of meanness personified. Be yourself. Your colleagues/friends will think you're the weirdest thing they've come across. Be yourself. Everyone will be too busy to hang out with you. Be yourself. You'll turn obese thanks to your craving for food. Be yourself. Your pet will ignore you. Be yourself. You're meant to be taken for granted. Somewhere in all this, feel proud about being yourself.

After a very long time, I decided to not be myself and let the tears roll.

And it felt f*****g good!

Youtubemademesmile

I'm hooked on to this

It's clean, fun, unique and full of love.

Warms the cockles of my heart:)

Tranquebar Holidays are fun things :)

With every passing day, you feel like you're going to wind up in some obscure corner... lonely, tired, hungry, worn out. When all is revealed, you will realise that every single minute was carefully crafted to lead you to your ultimate form - A detached lump of human being-ness bereft of love, passion, dreams and ambition.

"Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for."

Perhaps. Maybe. Probably.

All that I need is a long, uninterrupted purple bike ride. The world does seem very different from the seat of a bicycle. I think mine would look a few shades happier.

*Happy Sigh*

In a few weeks I am going to be unemployed. While most people are giving me free advice and wondering why I'm not actively searching for anything new, I can't help but not think about how my career graph is going to end up.

I'm excited. There's a wedding in the family. After ages we're all going to be together again. My artsy-craftsy moods visit me regularly and I like how they work their magic on me. I'm making good use of a thoughtful gift and visit the neighbourhood library frequently. When my "final settlement" cheque comes I'm going to be rich (okay temporarily but rich is rich!) and I'm thinking of a short but well deserved holiday.

The job, the steady income... it will all come. As of now, I'm going to LIVE IT UP! Life's looking great :)

Before taking any decision I ask myself one question: Will this make you happy?

Somehow putting things under the Yes/No light helps to lead an uncomplicated life.

Yes, shifting and starting afresh in a new city, meeting and working with new people, indulging in some soul searching... all of it is going to make me happy. Very happy.

"There was a point in time when I cared about people. I was genuinely concerned about their likes, dislikes, dreams, fears. I would remember birthdays and take time off to make each one special. I don't know when I became so... indifferent and cold. Or did I just turn cynical and bitter?"

"I've known you for three years now. You haven't changed at all."

Sometimes all that it really takes is one conversation with someone who likes you for the mercurial nut that you are.

Plainly put, I'm happy but not euphoric. I want to be giddily glad.

If 2012 is supposed to be a great year, I'd like to see the signs soon.

Feb would be a great place to start.

*fingers crossed*

One of the biggest reasons I love working with children is because they act their age.

Something we "adults" should keep in mind.

Half of the time we're gone but we don't know where,
And we don't know where.

A line from one of my favourite songs. I love how it hints at sadness, aspiration, friendship, loneliness, joy and philosophy... akin to the year that's been.

And the year that is on its way.

Not as fresh as mint.... or as spirited as this blog was intended to be.


May 2012 be better in some ways.

Some days...

...just go by. The same mundane routine, the same road you walk on, the same pair of jeans... And on such a day when you least expect it, you get smashed by an A-ha moment. Right there... hitting your head, heart and soul. You rise from the dead. And you begin to feel.

This is significant because it makes me feel content. Let go off the bumpy past. Let the future be. Just that one moment was the closest to your idea of perfection. And now you roll in it, look at it from every angle, play with it and then allow it to calm you down. Its beauty lies in its unpredictable nature. And how it makes you believe once again.

Gonna enjoy this for all that it is worth. Every bit of it.... While this plays in the background.

Some days must be lived all over again :)

Hope

I believe that there are good people wherever you go. Good neighbours, good friends and yes, good strangers.

My pooch has been missing for a day now. He's a big, friendly fellow with a heart of gold. While it is upsetting to think of a member of the family out in the world; unprotected, cold and hungry, we're giving him time to return and are combing every area for any kind of a lead.

All through the course we have only met people who have genuinely shown concern. They have helped by letting us stick posters in and around their shops, spreading the word, handing out flyers and sharing the news on the internet. Not once has anyone refused to reach out. The world may work in weird ways but at the end of the day we are all human and some basic instinct makes us look out for each other. And that is what keeps us going...

Come back home, Papa Dog. We're waiting.

Ear Candy

Corn popping in the microwave. Paul Simon's voice. Excited yelps and whines. Pitter-patter of the rain on my roof. Children laughing. Masala sizzling in the kadhai while Ma cooks. Rustling of the wrapping paper as you open a gift. Heart and Soul on the piano. "New Message Received" beep. Clicking cameras. Spinning wheels of my bicycle. Lip smacking. The oven going "bing". Wind chimes in the balcony. Whistling trains. The Brit accent.

I am cut out... To teach. To make my life a journey of learning every minute. To bake a fabulous batch of cookies. To lend a patient ear whenever needed. To take care of my family. To travel by myself and widen my outlook. To meet people, absorb as much as I can and be on my way. To be cold and indifferent when I have to. To be free spirited.

I'm at a crossroad. I'm tipping towards the path that will keep me driven, happy, free of other worthless emotions.

What I have in life I deserve. What I don't have, I don't need.